The comedy legend unbegrudgingly (some might even say willingly) signed my copy of his new book, The President’s Desk. A daring nudie run across the political landscape of the world’s most beloved superpower. Well that’s what the back cover says, I haven’t actually read it yet.

The excitement of the fresh autograph donning the inside sleeve of this future literary masterpiece quickly turned to dismay, as I got home and realised Shaun had not returned my pen.

I am assuming it was just an oversight on his behalf. But it’s quite possible ABC funding cuts are running so deep they are now starting to impact the upper echelon of ABC workers. Whatever the case, I really want my favourite pen back!

Description of the pen:

• About 3 inches tall
• Black in appearance
• May have been wearing a cap

Last seen with: Shaun Micallef (pictured below looking anything but innocent)

Anyone with information pertaining to its whereabouts, please call Crimestoppers on 1800 330 000. Actually it might even be easier if you simply leave a message below. That way I’ll actually be kept in the loop and you won’t tie up valuable police resources.

Anyone without information pertaining to its whereabouts, please buy Shaun’s book, head down to the ABC studios and get him to sign it. If he uses a pen matching the description above, grab it and run! And then leave a message below with details on where I can meet you to pick it up.

I’m counting on you Team Australia!

A letter recently sent to the Prime Minister:

To Mr Abbott,

Whilst I have numerous complaints in relation to the direction in which you and your party’s policies are taking Australia, I will contain myself to one issue which has triggered my writing this letter.

Your recent attack on our national broadcaster is nothing more than a grooming exercise, preparing the public no doubt for an attempt to cut funding to the ABC, one of the major sources of information for Australians who would like their news untouched by the Murdoch media and other news corporations pedalling a neo conservative agenda.

You stated that the ABC “appears to be taking everyone’s side but our own”. With this statement you imply that the Australian population are all on one side, that we all want the same thing. Need I remind you that millions of Australians DID NOT vote Liberal in the recent election and therefore do not subscribe to your ideology of what is best for Australia.

You may wish to remind yourself and your colleagues that Australia is a culturally, linguistically, ethnically and religiously diverse nation (one of the most diverse in the world) filled with people with an enormous range of views, ideologies, practices, beliefs and lifestyles. If I were you, I would prepare myself for the knowledge that there are more “sides” out there than you could count.

Australia has just been condemned by the United Nations for 150 violations of international law. If I am on Australia’s “side” are you suggesting I must support these illegal activities?

I am personally offended by you implying that because I am against Australia’s current treatment of asylum seekers, because I believe Australia must uphold its commitment to the Refugee Convention, because I value the United Nations Declaration of Human Rights, because I demand accountability and transparency from my government and because I have the audacity to attempt to educate and inform myself on a variety of issues, both domestic and global, from a range of sources including the ABC, that I am not on Australia’s side. I would argue the latter, that by practicing my rights as an individual to hold my own opinions and access whatever news I choose, I am living a very “Australian” life, as this is a democracy after all.

You nationalistic rhetoric is frightening and reminiscent of the lead up to horrendous violations of human rights and dignity in the world’s not too distant past, as are your attempts to quieten media outlets who dare to report the truth and challenge the actions of the government.

A free press is the cornerstone of any democracy and a democracy is the ultimate form of governance. Your attempts to erode this much valued gift (a gift that many Australian lives have been lost defending) will only be met with more resistance and far less votes in the next election.

I will leave you with a quote from a great man whose funeral you recently attended.

“For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others” – Nelson Mandela.

Sincerely,

Erin Joyce
Humanitarian worker, social worker and proud Australian citizen